The truest things we can do
Once again, as I am looking back at some of my early reflections, those that rise to the “top” when choosing that filter continue to be just as relevant today as when posted last year—if not more so, in many cases. This is another that feels like something I would be writing to myself today.
I originally wrote this reflection on March 4, 2020, almost two weeks before we went on lockdown here and I published it on June 19th, three months after lockdown. What a time of overwhelm for us all. What a time to reflect on expectations—from society, from our loved ones and colleagues, and most of all from ourselves.
Only recently have I begun to realize the weight of those expectations. One last (maybe) shout out to Eva’s post on the covid wall that brought to light all of the feelings I’d been unable to articulate. We’ve been conditioned to find the good, the silver lining, the “reason” for all the bad things that happen to us, in order to make things okay. Because living in a state of not okay is somehow not okay.
This post was one of the ways I was trying to tell myself, even a year ago, before the shit hit the fan and the world turned upside down, that it was okay to shut off the expectations of the world—and of myself. That is was okay for things to not be okay.
if there is ever a day
when you are overwhelmed
by a crowd of expectations
and you are not ready
to throw yourself
on the line
in the way those above you
seem to want you to,
may you know this to be true:
you do not have to meet
every gatekeeper’s
expectation of you
in order to show up
in a way that is trueMorgan Harper Nichols
Story Teller (App)
Sometimes, the gatekeeper we might be trying desperately to please is ourselves. Sometimes, our own expectation for our performance is too lofty for the current state of our body and mind. Sometimes, we need to give ourselves the grace to take a step back.
We are no good to ourselves, our loved ones, our causes if we are in a constant state of anxiety and overwhelm. Don’t let the weight and responsibility of this world overcome you.
Pausing, breathing, resting. Sometimes, those are the truest things we can do.
Add your Echo:
What can you do this week to release the expectations of others, or of yourself, to pause and rest?
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